break-up lyrics

My sister often blogs her new song lyrics, but I haven't been inspired to write anything decent about my break-up. I tried to, but the songs were just bad- bad words, bad structure. And at this point in my life, when the break-up was half a year ago, I don't really get angry or sad enough to be inspired to write anything. Most of the time the past seems so distant, and I like it that way. Maybe someday I'll have a break-up I can look back on fondly... but that's not really a goal I should set, ha.
So this blog does not contain any amazing original lyrics. BUT the other day I found the new Relient K CD, "Forget and Just Move On." It's an album full of break-up songs, and as the band has a Christian influence, they're optimistic as well as honest. Listening to country music break-up songs depresses me, though the lyrics are honest, but Christian music often contains hope and processing about the pain of the past.

"How many times
Can I push it aside
Is it time I befriended all the ghosts of all the things that haunt me most
So they leave me alone
Move on with my life
Be certain the steps of left and right don't fight the direction of upright

I'd rather forget and not slow down
Than gather regret for the things I can't change now"

These lyrics, from "Forget and Just Slow Down," hit me deep. The easiest thing to do is to just try and forget, to push the past aside and find things to keep you busy. As time passes on this does work, because you forget things, but if you see that person who hurt you so bad, in a picture, or worse, in person, or even hear their name, sometimes it comes rushing back and you see that you need to process it a little bit. Processing can be painful- of course! But I think it's healthy to look back and say, "What am I feeling right now?" "Why does this hurt?"

"'Cause if you close your eyes and listen close
You can hear the chapter close...
I don't need a soul
Without you I'm still whole"
These lyrics, from "I Don't Need a Soul," are so hopeful and true. My chapter with my ex-boyfriend has closed, and I'm so glad. Sometimes, with flashbacks, I hear the chapter close again. I'm so excited about my next chapter and the things that I will control and do. I don't need a "soul" mate, because I am whole on my own. God has not left my side. I do have regrets, but they are only for things I could not have controlled. Do I sometimes wish back the past so I could do it differently? Hell yeah. I don't think that God had this happen for a reason. God is not mean and destructive. But sometimes awful things happen, and God is present with you through it. I can handle that!